Standing Out in the Rain with Joan Rivers

(Note: There are what some would consider spoilers in this movie review. So if you want to see the movie completely "unspoiled," don't read any further!)

With my 100-calorie white cheddar popcorn bags safely tucked away in my purse, I was finally on my way to see the new documentary, Joan Rivers: A Piece of Work. I knew that if I didn't sneak in a quasi-healthy snack option with me I would either cave and buy the movie theater hypertension-in-a-bucket popcorn with extra squirts of buttery flavored cholesterol or I would sit there miserable listening to the torturous sounds of everyone else blissfully munching away.

The theater was filled with innocent-looking grey-haired ladies wearing cluster rings on their fingers and cardigan sweaters draped over their shoulders. But looks can be deceiving. Those little old ladies might be sweet, pie-baking grandmas, but by the sounds of their giggling and guffawing, they loved a raunchy Joan Rivers' vagina joke just as much as the gaggle of gay men sitting two rows down from me.

After approximately twenty seven previews and commercials, the movie opened with an extreme close-up of Joan getting her makeup on. Joan baring her naked face--flaws and all--set the tone for the entire movie.

Although Joan is innately funny, she stresses how hard she works to create her seemingly off-the-cuff humor. Jokes don't write themselves and she doesn't have a team of writers working for her. Never comfortable resting on her laurels, she is constantly writing new material and trying it out every week in a hole-in-the-wall New York comedy club. And every joke Joan has ever written is typed up and literally filed away in a card catalogue organized by topic. You never know when you might need to find a prostitute joke in a hurry!

Like Liberace, Joan lives in a gilded, glittering palace … or as she puts it, how Marie Antoinette would've lived if she had money. Gaudy? Yes. But could you picture Joan living in a three-bedroom, two-bath brick ranch-style house decorated with Rooms-To-Go furniture? I think not. Joan says that working her ass off to support her lavish lifestyle is worth it to her since she loves her "creature comforts." Not mention that she's also supporting a large staff, her charities, family members, and she even pays to send some of her employees' kids to private school. That's a heavy load for such a tiny lady to carry.

Joan also claims to have a deep-seated need to constantly work in order to feel fulfilled, loved, and valued as a person. She will not turn down any paying job no matter where it is or how undignified the work might be. Her biggest fear is an empty date book.

Joan is keenly aware that she has become the butt of plastic surgery jokes. And while I understand her critics, at least Joan freely admits to it! Just in home shopping land alone, there is a plethora of nipped, tucked, sucked, and injected hosts and spokespeople who refuse to admit that anything other than a magic potion (which is available for 5 easy payments of $19.99, by the way)  melted the years away. No man has ever told Joan that she was beautiful. Apparently that insecurity coupled with the pressures of show business have fueled her fetish.

But all the plastic surgery can't stop the sands of time from slipping away. The older you get, the people in your life who can remember the big milestones and the silly inside jokes begin to dwindle until no one is left. Sharing your memories keeps the people you love and the memories you cherish alive in your heart and at seventy-five, Joan is finding that there just isn't anyone left anymore who can "remember when …" with her.

Unfortunately for me, the documentary didn't focus much on Joan's jewelry line or her QVC visits. I was hoping for some interesting behind-the-scenes tidbits. Honestly, what would QVC be today if it weren't for Joan Rivers?

I will not call her an icon, a trailblazer, or a mentor since that would only piss her off. I will say that she is a brilliant comedy writer and performer who has made her own luck through a helluva a lot of hard work and perseverance.

Lightning might not strike often, but--as Joan would advise--if you want to get hit, you gotta stand out in the rain.

Joan Rivers is Some Piece of Work

Joan Rivers' new documentary “A Piece of Work” just debuted at Sundance. In order to show the reality of what is takes to stay on top in a merciless industry, the QVC Queen of Comedy granted a camera crew full access to her life for a year. Although I’m just dying to see what life is like behind-the-scenes for my favorite foul-mouthed comedian, it’s not scheduled to show at a movie theater near me any time soon.

Until I get the pleasure of seeing the movie for myself, I’ll defer to my favorite critic Roger Ebert (and if you aren’t already following him on Twitter, you should be!)

Joan Rivers: A Piece of Work If ever a movie has an accurate title, this is the movie. Joan Rivers gave the filmmakers access to her life for a year, she was frank, open and honest, and the result is one of the most truthful documentaries about show business I've seen. Also maybe the funniest.

… Rivers is 75, something she repeats several times, and at 67 myself I know it sounds condescending to say she hasn't lost a beat, but she hasn't. She remains one of the most transgressive and fearless of comedians, and one of the quickest, fastest and most merciless. The doc shows a life force of formidable energy. In one stretch she closes a show in Toronto, flies overnight to Palm Springs, does a gig, flies overnight immediately back to Minneapolis, and performs another one. She's upfront about plastic surgery, her husband Edgar, her daughter Melissa, and how after she left as Johnny Carson's permanent guest host he never spoke to her again and she was blackballed by NBC until last year. In the Q&A session Rivers gave her opinion of the Leno/Conan/NBC matter: "Fuck 'em all." Urgent to MSNBC: Feature this woman as a guest commentator and crawl under your desks.

Piece of Work Facebook Page
Piece of Work on Twitter

Joan Goes Nuclear!

If you haven't seen it already, you must watch the foul-mouthed fireworks fly!!!

Taking full advantage of all the free publicity she's getting today, Joan was on QVC early this morning and got an on-air call from fellow Celebrity Apprentice, Jesse James. He's the only remaining contestant left who Joan likes in the slightest. She thinks he's incredibly cool, talented, and loves that he has a two-legged dog and a three-legged dog (I have to admit, that last part kinda wins me over too).

According to her blog, now she's out for blood:

Now that all the other players that I adore are gone, I just want to win. It’s that simple. Brandeeee is silly and weak and believes whatever anyone says to her (as long as they say it slowly and with words that are no longer than two syllables). Clint is blinded by his own arrogance and cannot be a part of any team. And Annie is sooooo determined to win at any price and so she treats everyone as an opponent. People are not like a deck of playing cards. You can’t shuffle, play and discard your teammates just to pull a winning hand for yourself. Watch her…she plays life like it’s a poker game.

I want to beat them all but I want to do it without losing my integrity or having to lie, cheat or backstab. If I’m going down in flames, it will be honorably.

I guess that answers the question about whether or not she'll come back to the show.

BTW, you can vote on what Joan should wear on the finale of the show here.

Joan Rivers: Small & Mighty!

I don't know if you've been keeping up with Joan on The Celebrity Apprentice, but things are getting dicey--especially with a certain pig-headed country crooner. Joan speaks her mind about all the lying, cheating, and backstabbing on her QVC blog.

I thought from the beginning that Joan was playing it smarter than everyone else. Who else wears a necklace on the show and turns around the next night and sells it on the Q as part of her new Boardroom Collection? Brilliant and quite business savvy! Win or lose, she beats everyone. Hands down.

After both teams failed to make a viral video that All liked and there was a double elimination, All Small & Mighty asked Joan and Melissa to make their own viral videos. You can check them out here and be doing something good for charity for your trouble--every time that you do, 50¢ goes to charity.

Melissa and I were asked by All Small & Mighty to do other videos. Here’s the best part: They donated $20,000 to each of our charities as a thank you!! Melissa’s is the Lili Claire Foundation, which gives counseling to families of terminally ill children. Mine—after God’s Love We Deliver—is Guide Dogs for the Blind. Keep an eye on the web for our videos!

Go Joan! FTW!!!

Knock it Off!

As much air time as Angelina Jolie's ginormous emerald earrings received during the Oscars, how soon do you think it'll be before we see a knock off on QVC or HSN???

I have absolutely no idea what all us non-red-carpet-goers are supposed to do with these green baubles besides donate them to a needy drag queen, but you know how home shopping channels love to be "inspired" by those red carpet fashions.

Although I do suppose they might be the perfect accessory for when you need a quick midweek dinner, so you decide to swing by the Walmart after work to pick up one of those rotisserie chickens and a bag of triple-rinsed salad.

But the big question is, who will win the frenzied race to be first with their "unique interpretation?"

Kenneth Jay Lane? Joan Rivers? Hot in Hollywood? Suzanne Somers? Diamonique? Absolute?

Angie knows not what home shopping costume jewelry chaos she has unleashed!

Can We Talk? Cartier Sues QVC!

According to WWD, Cartier, that ubiquitous French staple of the wanna be rich and stylish, is suing QVC for selling some Joan Rivers watches that infringe on their designs.

They're kidding, right?

Cartier is threatened by Joan Rivers on the Q? Seriously???

Do they understand that us poor folk survive off these celebrity-endorsed cheap, plastic knock-offs from home shopping channels? How else are we going to look "Madison Avenue" or "Ladies Who Lunch?" Honestly!

I wonder which of her watches they are talking about. Joan needs to leak that information because you know those particular watches would start selling like haute cakes!

Aren't all watches ripoffs of other watches in some form or fashion? I'm sure all of Cartier's designs are "pure" either. If I were Joan, I would take it as a huge compliment that Cartier thinks hers are so good they're worth suing over.

I don't have any of her watches, but I do have this Steel by Design watch that is ... ahem ... Cartier inspired (it even has the blue hands). I love it and wear it almost every day. And, trust me, I wasn't debating between getting the $35 watch and the $10,000 watch!

Joan Rivers Plans to Donate Body to Tupperware

The ever-industrious Joan Rivers has a new book coming out about one of her favorite topics, plastic surgery, "Men Are Stupid . . . and They Like Big Boobs." I would have to agree with her on both counts.

In this funny interview with the New York Times, Joan claims to have had two face lifts, lip plumping about every six months, and liposuction on her thighs. And, no, she doesn't think that she's addicted to plastic surgery at all. She's just in a youth-obsessed business where growing old gracefully doesn't pay the bills.

"I’ve had so much plastic surgery," Joan said, "when I die they will donate my body to Tupperware."

And just in case you were curious about her political views, well, she also thinks that the President-Elect Barak Obama should have had his ears pinned back years ago.

Shopping Around ... Info Dump

So I've been slacking on the blog over the Thanksgiving holiday and my inbox overfloweth. This is going to be the biggest info-dump post ever. I just have to clear out some clutter! I can't take it anymore!




Kathy McGuire, inventor of My Little Weatherbuddy, got to meet Joan Rivers backstage at the Q after their 22nd Birthday Holiday Party. Kathy said Joan was "so nice and gorgeous" and that she had a great first experience on QVC, "I couldn't of had a better time in Disney world." I'm so jealous! I love Joan!


Finally! Someone is listening to me! I have nagging ad nauseum about high shipping costs and finally the-powers-that-be cleaned the wax outta their ears and listened. According to this Wall Street Journal article, it’s been all about the free shipping this holiday season.


Say bye-bye to bling-bling, electronics is now the Q’s most popular business (I wonder if this could this have anything to do with King George coming from Dell?) There's just one little problem with this: unlike jewelry, electronics has a very low profit margin.


Here's a warning that some of the coins sold on the home shopping channels might not be uncirculated as they claim. Basically this boils down to just buying what you love for fun and not buying because of some perceived future value. The best advice on the topic can be found on Steve Bryant's website (former QVC host). And while your there, take a quick listen to his song parodies (FYI--some are NSFW).


When the markets tanked last Monday (not to be confused with all the other days that it tanked), HSN dropped 24 percent to $2.84. That's in one day, folks. Wow.


Carol Alt is bringing her RAW beauty products to HSN and they are raw for real, y'all—as in not cooked. I knew about the raw eating trend, but I didn’t know that it extended into other non-edible products too. I could never do that whole raw eating thing since I (usually) love to cook! That would just suck too much joy out of my life. Oh well, to each her own.


Apparently iPhone is greedy enough to lower themselves to Walmart, but still too good for the Q. I guess you gotta draw the line somewhere, right?


This is a great article about not confusing home shopping hosts with real friends--even if they are nice people. Hosts are just doing their job by selling you stuff in an entertaining and friendly manner. And I really wish that the Q would stop all their talk about the big, happy QVC family--especially since they're canning hundreds of their beloved family members.


Here's a good write up for JTV’s watch website, which is much better than the regular Jewelry Television site--great pictures and easy navigation. I thought I'd post this since there hasn't been much good news coming out of JTV recently. Gotta take what you can get.


Mindy Grossman, CEO of HSN, was named number 28 on the 2008 Top 50 Most Powerful Women in Cable list. Why? Because HSN “has posted revenue growth during a time when most retailers have been challenged. Her reputation in the retail industry combined with her vision of HSN as a new retail frontier have made HSN a top choice for brands and strategic partners who had previously been averse to TV retailing, including Condé Nast, Sephora, Nate Berkus and Coty Inc. Her strategy of combining lifestyle entertainment and commerce has had an impact on the retail industry as well as on other media.” Forget King George over at the Q—all hail Queen Mindy!


This article details how Internet sales are becoming a bigger chunk of total home shopping sales. Personally, I never call to order anything. I am exclusively an online kind of a girl since I like to comparison shop and read reviews before making a purchase. I also do NOT like the pressure of the on-air sale (only two per state left!) I do, however, enjoy listening to the designer or inventor of the product describe and explain what they are selling. You just don’t get that kind of expertise from the eighteen-year-old at the mall. I think that the on-air and online compliment each other quite nicely and, really, the Internet is home shopping’s only hope for remaining a relevant shopping format in the future.


Here are some articles about some smart ladies with smart products who worked hard and got lucky by getting to go on QVC: Affirmagy, Butler Bag, and Lapper Trays. Congrats to all!


Interesting article about the science behind the Living Proof NoFrizz product, which won the Allure Beauty Breakthrough of the Year and is now sold on QVC. I checked out the reviews and they are definitely a mixed bag. We can fly a man to the moon, but we can't cure baldness or tame frizzy hair--go figure.


HSN's Terry Lewis gets a glowing review here for her line of "investment coats." Sounds impressive.


Fashion designer Arnold Scaasi has designed for Jacqueline Kennedy and now he’s launching a jewelry line on HSN featuring hematite, pearls, enamel and gemstones. I swear, home shopping channels are like Las Vegas—at some point everyone ends up performing there.

The Reviews Are In!

I recently asked all you lovely ladies (and gentlemen, of course) for your honest opinion about that time-honored home shopping tradition of on-air testimonials. Boy do y’all have some strong opinions!

What was the overwhelming response? How shall I put this … well, here are just a few quotes. I think you’ll get the picture pretty quickly.


“Dumb, dumb, dumb. Does anyone ever call and say this sucks?”

“I hate them like a Yankee Fan hates the Red Sox.”

“I tune them out or press the mute button. They bore me to death.”

“Hate them. Especially … the death call.”

“These calls are usually painful to listen to. Sometimes these testimonials force me to change the channel or mute the TV...I can't tolerate them.”

“I usually turn the channel when the callers start talking...”

“I dislike callers gushing over the hosts, providing sensitive personal information, saying "Hi" to someone in the next room, or just plain blabbing too much.”


Don’t beat around the bush now, tell me how you really feel!

There were several comments about how the exchanges make the hosts and vendors uncomfortable, to the point that you can’t watch (or at least mute it until the train wreck is over). I have to admit that when a caller starts talking about an illness or death (the oh-so-dreaded “death call”), I will physically dive for the remote control. I just can’t change the channel fast enough!

One reader pointed out the she preferred watching ShopNBC and Jewelry Television because they had few to no on-air testimonials. I wonder if they are doing this on purpose, or they just can’t get anyone to talk to them!

There were complaints all around that they were simply pointless and boring because you already knew ahead of time that the caller was going to rave about the product. As one reader said, “I am always waiting for someone to call up and say how much they DON'T like something or a caller who says that the workmanship on the QVC clothes has gone down hill over the years. Someone who will say how so NOT on trend their clothing is. That would be interesting.”

I have seen a handful of negative calls—although they are few and far between—and the “uncomfortable” factor just shoots through the roof as the host and vendor’s worst fears are realized on live television.

I had a few people tell me that they enjoyed listening to callers when certain vendors, like Joan Rivers and Jeanne Bice, were there because they try to make everything fun and entertaining. I think there is really something to this. It takes a certain type of person to be able to artfully handle off-the-cuff conversations with complete strangers while trying to sell products. This isn’t a skill that most people have. Joan not only is blessed with natural wit, she can also draw from her years of experience dealing with hecklers while doing her stand-up comedy. How many hosts and vendors have that reservoir of experience?

In fairness, there was one positive remark: if the caller asked a relevant question about the product, and the host or vendor gave and informative response, the call is good. This, of course, ties into the new-fangled online questions that QVC is doing, which most of you seemed tentatively optimistic about. I think it has great potential since most of the questions are better and there isn’t a “cringe factor” going on. Maybe they need to spiff it up with some on-air graphics or something. I do think that they’re going in the right direction though.

I would be remiss if I didn’t mention this one email that made my snarky attitude come crashing down around me. I forget that there are many, many home shopping viewers that are elderly, shut-ins, and lonely people. I forget that they feel like they have a real bond with the hosts and vendors.

“I am vaguely embarrassed by the on-air testimonials on home shopping channels...but I see they fill a need for some women who are lonely and just want to talk to someone and have some attention paid to them. My mother *adores* getting to speak to her favorite hosts and their guests on QVC. She is always talking about them to me like they are her personal friends and how sweet they are...in my cynicism I see how caught up she is while these people could care less. It is only part of their jobs.”

I’m left wondering if these calls are harmless entertainment that provides some level of company or comfort to those that don’t otherwise have it—or—if these people are being horribly manipulated and mistreated into spending their money. I don’t have an answer, but I will leave you with some words of wisdom that this wonderful reader sent me.

“The bigger lesson here is: cultivate your own interests, because you can't count on your children or a home shopping host to be your constant companions. Growing old gracefully means that you have hobbies you enjoy, good friends, and the ability to reach outside yourself to the world around you. I don't want to live my later years with the QVC host as the only person I've talked to all day.”

Shopping Around: "like whores out of a ..."

• In this in-depth article about interior decorator, Nate Berkus, discusses losing his partner in the 2004 Sri Lanka tsunami and how the experience changed him, coming out to his parents, and what Oprah is really like behind the scenes. Some interesting facts: Nate’s dad used to sell sport’s memorabilia on HSN (like father, like son, right?), he’s the oldest of six siblings, and he thinks that The Wiener's Circle in Chicago “have the best hot dogs in the world.”
  
  
• “QVC free samples? It’s like getting whores out of a ...” Joan Rivers pulls no punches in her latest interview—Sarah Palin, Clay Aiken, and QVC should take cover!
  
  
• The Swanky Pup found some great pet buys on the Q. If you have a little fur baby, check out their recommendations.
  
  
• The chair of Liberty Media, John Malone, sold 4.5 million shares back to Liberty Media …why??? One day I might understand all this high finance mumbo jumbo.
  
  
• Don’t forget, the 15th annual "FFANY Shoes on Sale" 7-10 p.m. Wednesday, Oct. 15. More than 100,000 pairs of brand-name shoes from about 100 brands will be offered at half the manufacturer's suggested retail price, with net proceeds marked for breast cancer research and educational institutions. Over the past 14 years, the event has sold more than a million pairs of shoes and donated about $28 million to the cause.

Joan Rivers Gagged by AOL for Nazi Remarks

Here's the article from Page Six of the New York Post:

JOAN and Melissa Rivers are livid over AOL's censorship of them. The duo did their comedic routine for myhollywood.com on Sunday for the Emmys, and AOL was supposed to link to a chunk of it. But their segment was booted when AOL suits thought it was too offensive.

In the routine, Joan cited the trend of men with "hair from the Third Reich. Tom Hanks - does that scream Nazi Germany? And . . . Julia Louis-Dreyfus - luckily she waxed her mustache. I know one of her neighbors, and if she leaves it for two or three weeks she looks just like Hitler . . . Heidi Klum? Super Nazi!"

Joan also referred to Eva Longoria-Parker as "Eva Longoria Porker" and ridiculed Oprah's big "ass."

Joan told us, "I was shocked that the suits at AOL have no humor . . . But that's OK. I've been gagged more times than Linda Lovelace. AOL is like Holocaust deniers. They want us to believe 6 million Jews spent World War II in Boca and Anne Frank was in an attic for two years looking for Christmas ornaments." AOL didn't return our e-mails.

What I have always loved about Joan (and other comedians) is their inability to censor themselves. Was she funny? offensive? just being honest? saying what everyone else is thinking, but too scared to say out loud? down right nasty?

Joan is the woman who is probably single-handedly responsible for inventing the "Red Carpet" fashion runway as we know it today. I think people forget that getting skewered is part of the deal. In fact, some celebs try very, very, very hard to get panned in hopes of some free publicity. If that doesn't work, they might resort to accidentally forgetting to wear underwear (and nobody wants that!)

Watch for yourself ... (BTW, this is probably NSFW):

Who Got Their Hair Extensions Handed to Them?

Joan Rivers got Adrienne in a choke hold and didn't even break an acrylic nail!

In Queen Bea's first Home Shopping Cage Match, Joan slaughtered fellow plastic surgery loving, makeup and accessory peddling diva, Adrienne, with 81% of the vote!!!

Congratulations Joan!!!


Don't forget to vote in this week's patent-to-patent match up between Lori "The Safekeeper" Greiner and Joy "The Hanger" Mangano!

Today's Blue Plate Specials ... Suck

The HSN TS is a 2.98ct Ruby Sterling Silver "Vintage" Ring. You see, I love rubies. But I love really good rubies. The kind that are more expensive per carat than good diamonds. In light of the fact that I am not Oprah, I make due with the lab-created variety. "Real" rubies--like the kind in this ring--do nothing for me.



The QVC TSV is an Oreck Restaurant Vacuum with Floor Sweeper,Crystal Aroma & Deodorize. I haven't ever used an Oreck, but I've heard that they're great. However, can they still compete against the Dyson? I don't know. It did get the Arthritis Foundation Ease-of-Use Commendation.



Yet another in a long, long line of watch OTV's from ShopNBC. I love the watch itself, but hate the bands that come with it. They cheapen the look of the watch.

There is an online only Offerings Trunk Show. Check it out here. One of these days I'm going to actually order something from Offerings instead of just window shopping.

Don't forget to vote if this week's HOME SHOPPING CAGE MATCH!

Adrienne Arpel vs. Joan Rivers

Fashion jewelry, watches, makeup, skincare, purses, and plastic surgery ... they both do it all ... but who does it better???

QVC's "Un-Commercial" Commercial

QVC is rolling out a new "uncommercial" ad campaign that will feature outtakes and bloopers (you know, those special "QVC moments"). I guess regular old commercials are sooo 5 minutes ago!

“The ‘screen test’ nature of the commercials is unique in today’s overcrowded media world, because it is real; no prepackaged scripts, corporate-speak or overproduction,” said Jeff Charney, QVC's senior vice president and chief marketing officer. The campaign should highlight QVC's “authenticity and on-air spontaneity.”

One spot will feature Joan Rivers talking about how she would have romanced Faberge in another life (seems rather toned down for Joan, don't you think???)

I guess this is the Q's take on the popularity of reality TV ... you know, they're keeping it real with the peeps on the street. Holla!

I am glad to see that they are at least trying to act like they don't take themselves so freakin' seriously all the time.

And if you check out You Tube, you'll find that home shopping bloopers are very, very popular. This one always comes up first (I always feel bad for the poor guy though!):

Joan Rivers Drops F-Bomb on Girl Scouts

According to the Orlando Sentinel, Joan Rivers dropped the F-bomb at the Girl Scout "Women of Distinction" fundraiser. She even joked that Paris Hilton didn't earn her "Wearing Panties" Patch. Hah!!!

I've read that some uppity attendees found her routine rude and disrespectful. You know what? They need to get over themselves. These easily-offended people knew Joan Rivers was performing. And just in case they hadn't caught any of Joan's colorful act over the last fifty years or so, there was a warning that this was for "mature" audiences. There was even an awesome quote from historian Laurel Thatcher Ulrich: "Well behaved women rarely make history!" Check it out for yourself below:

Don't hire Joan Rivers if you don't want a Joan Rivers show! She will be foul, colorful, funny, rude, and look like she's walking through a wind tunnel. And at some point, she will offend everyone in the room. If you don't like that, don't go. Get over it, people!

Joan Kicked off a F*#&ing Talk Show!

Well, she promised to offend ... at least she's a lady who keeps her word! There's a bazillion articles flying around the Internet about her F-word incident on live TV, but here's what Joan had to say about the whole tawdry incident on her blog (note: if Joan offends you, or bad language offends you, or there are small children or pets nearby, then DON'T watch the clip!):

My Day in London

So I started my day with an appearance on an ITV chat show called Loose Women-very similar to the US show The View. We talked about my upcoming theatrical performances in Edinburgh and London and of course about the Red Carpet. When asked about interviewing Russell Crowe I told the ladies on the show exactly what I thought.

Here’s the link….you watch and tell me what you think. Better yet-tell ITV exactly what you think.

uk.youtube.com/watch

Following that segment I was asked to leave the studio….or as the British press explains….I was “hauled off”, “kicked out”, and “booted from” the studio. And without my goody bag, nonetheless!

So what did I do? I proceeded right over to the BBC and did The Graham Norton Show. I adore Graham-we’ve worked together many times and I always have a great time when I visit his show. AND what’s GREAT is that Graham’s show airs after 9pm so I can swear ALL I want. So tune in Thursday and watch and hear every swear word I know….and then some!

And stay tuned to the blog. I’m working on an appropriate apology letter to the ladies of Loose Women. Of course I will share that with all of you.

Joan Promises to Offend!

"Whatever I do, I promise it will be outrageous and offend people," about the Just for Laughs gala she is hosting tonight.

Think what you will about Joan Rivers, but girlfriend has stood the test of time in a tough, male-dominated field. She is 75-years-old and is still one of the top comediennes out there. How many other female comedians have had any longevity? I can think of a handful--Kathy Griffin, Ellen DeGeneres, Rosie O'Donnell--and none of them are in their seventies!

In an article for The Gazette Joan explains, "Comedy is a man's field. Always has been and always will be. The women who have made it have to be so strong to hang in." Preach on!

And what about Joan's love life??? Since her husband passed away in 1987, she has ventured to date a few men. "There was one fellow that I really wanted to keep around, but he died a couple of months ago and I figured he would have started to smell. Besides, there wouldn't have been much conversation, either."

Melissa Rivers will be on Girl's Night on the Q this Thursday from 7-10 p.m. After watching the promos for this, I'm thinking that there are going to be waaaaay too many chit-chatty hens in the hen house on that show! (Think TheView on crack!)

Joan will be back on July 1st.

And for the record, Queen Bea loooves Joan Rivers bawdy, unapologetic and (mostly) offensive humor! And I love her love of dogs. Click here to see pics of her new puppy, Samantha.

Joan Rivers Delivers New Baby Too!

No, not deliver exactly ... had delivered to her home perhaps! While on the Q with Lisa Robertson, Joan recently showed off the latest addition to her family--a 10-week-old Havanese puppy named Sam (short for Samantha).

Joan recently lost her dog, Lulu, to cancer, and although she knows that it isn't a good idea to get another dog while still in morning, she just felt the house was empty.

Joan said on her blog that she was looking for "a small, docile female. These requirements were essential as Max, my rescue Pekingese, hates everybody" He's not taking to the new addition and refuses to even be in the same room with her--poor little Sam!

As a dog lover, what Joan had to say about the recent passing of her beloved dog, Lulu, made me cry. My heart goes out to her.

"Unfortunately, our dear friend and beloved companion, Lulu, had to be put down early this morning. I’m sure, however, that she is now in a place where she can bark all she wants, lick all she likes, chew yellow tennis balls to her heart’s content, and feast on a never-ending bowl of delicious liver treats. Lulu shared my bed and my heart for 12 wonderful years. The thing that I will treasure (and miss) the most is that she is the only dog I ever had who truly smiled."

Lulu smiling

ETA: Be sure to check out Joan on Celebrity Family Feud on NBC in July where she faces off against rapper, Ice-T. My money is on Joan.