Showing posts with label Comedy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Comedy. Show all posts

Monday, March 23, 2009

Helen Keaney Needs a Bathroom Break!


Sadly, when Helen Keaney became an HSN host last summer, she had to hang up her stand-up comedy routine. But last night at the Tampa Improv, she finally got a chance to perform again--this time with some new, spicy material about all the behind-the-scenes shenanigans that goes on at HSN.

Ok, spicy shenanigans might be a bit of wishful embellishment on my part, but a girl can dream. According to Tampa Bay Online, Helen said that she was trying out some new material based on her life as a wife, mother and HSN host.

"It's clean, PG-rated stuff," she says. "I don't play to the rowdy late-night crowd. I'm more for people who can read."

Come on, Helen! I certainly enjoy my fair share of rowdy, late-night, not-PG-rated, dirty stuff and I think I can read. I just prefer my words to be shorter--roughly four letters in length. Any longer and my eyes just start to glaze over.

"I had done stand-up comedy for years, and I found that it was getting hard to travel because I have a 9-year-old daughter," she says. "And I was watching HSN all the time. And I thought it was time I stopped buying."

She says HSN seemed like the perfect place for a shopaholic. And she jokes she had to learn how to stay on air for four hours without a bathroom break.


Maybe this appearance will help Helen with her Wikipedia entry. Wikipedia is trying to give Helen the boot on her biography page do to "notability" issues--that means she's not famous enough. Poor Helen! We need to save the Helen Keaney Wiki Page! How exactly do you go about doing that anyhow?

Here's a clip from Helen doing stand up back when she was in the "3 Blonde Moms" comedy group:



You might have seen Helen on "Short Attention Span Theater," "The John Larroquette Show," "Not Necessarily the News with Dennis Miller," "An Evening at the Improv," "Girl’s Night Out," "VH-1’s “Stand-up Spotlight," "Movies For Guys Who Like Movies," and she can currently be seen hosting "You’re Invited" on the Style Network.

Home shopping hosts are so multi-faceted. Well, some of them are anyway.

Thursday, July 3, 2008

Home Shopping-isms Part Deux


Here is another list of some "Crazy Good" Home Shopping-isms emailed to be from someone who should know ... ;-)

1) This one is FLYING out the door! Hurry and get yours before they're all gone!

2) It practically irons itself!

3) Reduces the APPEARANCE of fine lines and wrinkles.

4) Be the envy of all your girlfriends.

5) All the rage on the red carpet.

6) Seen in all the fashion mags this season.

7) All the stars in Hollywood are wearing/using/talking about it.

8) Be the only one on your block to have this.

9) Can you imagine what it would be like to have this on your hand?

10) NOBODY will know you only spent 9.99 for this... NOBODY!

11) Get it today before they're gone because we don't k now when we will be able to get them back in stock. (And Queen Bea would like to add: even if we do manage to get them back in stock, it certainly won't be at this price!!!)

Read Queen Bea's list here and listen to the musical version by former QVC host, Steve Bryant here.

So what's your favorite home shoppingisms, chickadees?

Monday, June 30, 2008

Home Shopping-isms: The Musical!

Former host, Steve Bryant (remember him?!?!) performs the musical version of Home Shopping-isms and Queen Bea love, love, loves it! Check out my list here.

Monday, June 16, 2008

Joan Promises to Offend!


Think what you will about Joan Rivers, but girlfriend has stood the test of time in a tough, male-dominated field. She is 75-years-old and is still one of the top comediennes out there. How many other female comedians have had any longevity? I can think of a handful--Kathy Griffin, Ellen DeGeneres, Rosie O'Donnell--and none of them are in their seventies!

In an article for The Gazette Joan explains, "Comedy is a man's field. Always has been and always will be. The women who have made it have to be so strong to hang in." Preach on!

And what about Joan's love life??? Since her husband passed away in 1987, she has ventured to date a few men. "There was one fellow that I really wanted to keep around, but he died a couple of months ago and I figured he would have started to smell. Besides, there wouldn't have been much conversation, either."

Melissa Rivers will be on Girl's Night on the Q this Thursday from 7-10 p.m. After watching the promos for this, I'm thinking that there are going to be waaaaay too many chit-chatty hens in the hen house on that show! (Think TheView on crack!)

Joan will be back on July 1st.

And for the record, Queen Bea loooves Joan Rivers bawdy, unapologetic and (mostly) offensive humor! And I love her love of dogs. Click here to see pics of her new puppy, Samantha.

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