QVC and the Art of Instant Gratification

I don't think that a girl should have to wait for fake diamonds. That kinda defeats the purpose of buying the fake stuff. Diamonique is not something that you have to scrimp and save for and worry that it will go out of style in ten years after you spent a fortune to buy it. It's just a little something special you get for yourself because it's pretty and fun--instant sparkle gratification.

After a long fake diamond dry spell, I find myself rather enamoured with the new Judith Ripka Emerald Cut Wedding Band. I've had my eye on this ring for at least the last week--ever since those super sleuths on the Ripka message board found it (Shout out to the Ripka board! I know you already have a Queen, but perhaps I can be a visiting dignitary or something?)

But if I order it now, it won't even ship until June 18th.

Huh??? That's more then two months away!

Why didn't they just wait to sell it on June 18th? Maybe as a TSV? I'm completely baffled.

Of course, if you don't order today, you miss out on the special anniversary price. How annoying. Considering we have to wait for two months to get the ring, the Q could have at least offered free shipping or a special coupon for our inconvenience.

Patience is not and never has been a home shopping virtue. How can I fall prey to their slippery sales tactics and impulsively buy a ring that I don't really need if they aren't even going to send it to me?

As Margaret Thatcher said, "I am extraordinarily patient, provided I get my own way in the end."

Knock it Off!

As much air time as Angelina Jolie's ginormous emerald earrings received during the Oscars, how soon do you think it'll be before we see a knock off on QVC or HSN???

I have absolutely no idea what all us non-red-carpet-goers are supposed to do with these green baubles besides donate them to a needy drag queen, but you know how home shopping channels love to be "inspired" by those red carpet fashions.

Although I do suppose they might be the perfect accessory for when you need a quick midweek dinner, so you decide to swing by the Walmart after work to pick up one of those rotisserie chickens and a bag of triple-rinsed salad.

But the big question is, who will win the frenzied race to be first with their "unique interpretation?"

Kenneth Jay Lane? Joan Rivers? Hot in Hollywood? Suzanne Somers? Diamonique? Absolute?

Angie knows not what home shopping costume jewelry chaos she has unleashed!

Yes They Can!

On the night of January 20th, QVC will be celebrating the swearing in of our country's next president the only way they know how--by selling lots of useless "collectible" merchandise.

Host Leah Williams will broadcast from the Creative Coalition's inaugural ball in a fancy-schmancy inaugural gown (take that Lisa Robertson selling Swarovski crystal Diamonique stuff in a ballgown in Vienna!)

In between hawking commemorative coins, stamps, a simulated pearl necklace, and even a purse, QVC will broadcast parts of the parade and talk to random spectators on the street.

There is just nothing more American than this.

For Real, the Winner of the Fake Face Off Is ...

In a landslide victory with 72% of the vote (Wow!!!), Diamonique was chosen by you as the best fake diamond!

Diamonique beat out HSN's Absolute (3%), ShopNBC's Brilliante (1%), Jewelry Television's Bella Luce (0% -- no love for JTV!)

The second biggest vote getter was "doesn't matter, they're all the same anyway" with 12% of the vote and there are still some of you (actually 10% to be precise) out there who "would rather go naked than wear fake diamonds." I can't say that I relate to that particular segment of the population! Put some clothes on people!

Honestly, I would choose Diamonique also. Not because I think it is necessarily better, but because of the lifetime warranty that they offer (but no longer promote). That guarantee is worth spending the extra money. Not too many jewelry items come with that kind of backing.

Technibond on HSN--the gold-plated silver line--also used to be worth the extra money too. But then they got rid of the warranty and now it's just like any other plated jewelry product. Check out the story behind Technibond in my post here.

Here's the thing though. Most of the CZ used in these lines is made by Signity. (Yes, there was a line on ShopNBC by that name that has gone by the wayside and will supposedly return after the beginning of the year under a different name. Apparently there was some confusion between the manufacturer of Signity and the line by same name. I thought that it was very good by the way! Especially the steel and the diamond-coated CZ.)

So, in reality, most of this stuff really is the same. Don't get me wrong though, there are definitely some stinkers out there that look like a piece of cloudy, shadowy, cheap glass.

Since most of the stones are in actuality the same, my main concerns are the quality of the setting and the carat weight. Those flimsy gold setting have got to go. I know that the price of gold has gone up, but trying to stretch one gram of gold over a big ring just ain't gonna work.

Also, those huge stones need to be used sparingly. I have one big honker ring that I bought for fun, but I normally look for low carat weights spread out over lots of stones. I don't know who keeps buying those big rocks, but puh-leeze--for the love of all that's holy--stop!

And to those of you that wouldn't touch a fake diamond with a ten-foot pole, I think that life is short and jewelry should be fun. Spending tons of money and worrying about losing an earring isn't fun to me. Besides, by the time they treat many of those natural stones there's not much left that's natural about it (think Playboy model fake--they've had their nose done, their boobs done, their hair is dyed, they've had lipo, they've been waxed from head to toe, and they have a fake bake--but technically they are real, right?) But to each her own. Whatever you have, enjoy it! :-)

VOTE! Fabulous Fakes or Embarrassing Imitations

I love my fake diamonds.

Go ahead and judge me, I don't care. I'll be too blinded by my bling to notice your disapproving stares.

I am taking a poll though. Check it out on the top of the left-hand column. I want to know what you think about them--the good, the bad, and the ugly. What's your favorite fake?

Two Things ...

First, according to godFreako on the QVC message boards, the big, pave hoops from the Diamonique commercial that I've been drooling over will be sold for ... drum roll, please ... $248.12!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

Has QVC lost their minds? Two hundred and fifty dollars for CZ and silver ... for real? Is this supposed to be a joke? That must be a helluva a lot of platinum that they're plating on those earrings.

Y'all know how much I love my fake diamonds and I've been hunting for a big pair of pave hoops for a while now, so I was primed and ready with my wallet open and credit card in hand to buy those earrings tonight, but there is no number of Easy Pays that can make up for a ridiculous price tag like that. And for once I don't even care about free shipping. That price is just insulting.

Maybe they will realize the enormous error of their ways before tonight ... the Good Lord willing and the creek don't rise!

Second, the TSV--Keurig Ultimate Coffee Brewer w/ 54 K-Cups & My K-Cup Filter--is a rocking deal. Mr. Queen Bea wanted to get me a new coffee maker for Christmas and I do believe I have helped him find it!

My Bunn, which was supposed to last forever, now leaks more coffee than it makes. Although I'm sad and disappointed in my Bunn, I'm pretty sure that I can drink my sorrows away with this little baby.

The reviews are almost uniformly glowing (the naysayers seem to expect their own personal tree-hugging Starbucks barista to pop out of the machine to make their morning brew) and I can't find a better price. Plus you get 54 K-Cups, a coupon for more coffee of your choice, half-price shipping, and the K-Cup filter so you can use whatever coffee you want with it. And did I mention the 5 Easy Pays?

At least someone at the Q still has a clue. Oh! And I forgot to mention one of the best benefits of this coffee maker--watching the already hyper hosts get juiced up on caffeine all day!

So, when all is said and done, at least I will have a tasty cup of coffee to sip while I fume over my hoops (and they are mine even if they aren't technically in my possession).

If Lovin' You is Wrong Then I Don't Wanna be Right

So, here's the thing, I'm having a bit of a moral dilemma. During Diamonique Week, I ordered this ring. At the time, it was on sale for $22, which ain't too shabby for a $48 ring. And, as you all know, I have a forbidden love of fake diamonds--a love of which I can not speak in public--and I had been wanting a yellow stone for quite some time.

I'm no Jennifer Flavin Stallone, I will never be able to afford an actual canary diamond (of any size and quality that I would be willing to wear anyway). Besides, even if I could afford such outrageous bling, I would have more important things to spend my money on.

After reading the glorious reviews online, I decided to give this particular ring a whirl since the price was right.

And let me tell you, there is nothing quite like waiting for the UPS man carrying a little brown bag filled with something sparkly to get me through the long work day. Just a small something to keep me going.

Here's the thing, the yellow center stone is to die for. Gorgeous! It doesn't have that "fake look" at all. I even tried it in various types of lighting and it never failed to shine. However, the two side stones are terrible. Not only are they cloudy, they have a dead spot, which I believe is due to the way they were set. I might have been able to look past that considering the price, but then the prongs started attacking me and snagging my clothes. Those things are deadly!

Between the dead side stones and the deadly prongs, I have no intention of keeping the damn thing.

But here's where the moral dilemma comes in, do I keep it for a few months just for the fun of the beautiful center stone before sending it back or do I just ship it off now? The return policy does give me until the end of January. Technically I'm not doing anything wrong. In fact the hosts even encourage this behavior all the time!

Why-oh-why does it feel so wrong then?

Do other customers buy products during this extended return period knowing full well that they have no intention of keeping them? ... A home shopping loaner program of sorts.

In defence of keeping the ring longer, I still have to pay shipping. I deserve a little something for my trouble. Don't I???

BTW, the responses to the On-Air Testimonial question have been great! Please keep them coming. I will be posting your reactions soon.

For the Forbidden Love of Fake Diamonds

Oh, how I loves me some fake diamonds! QVC is kicking off Diamonique Week with a big ol' blingy bang. Wow! If this bracelet wasn't $300--yes, you read that right,Three.Hundred.Dollars.--I would be all over it.

*Sigh* I think I'll just be crying on me keyboard all day.

Syanara Signity & Ciao Charles Winston

Are Michael Valitutti and Charles Winston taking their fake diamonds and going home???


I haven't heard that Signity is leaving ShopNBC, but there are only 60 items left in stock on the website, no items for auction, and no shows scheduled.

Also, taking a look at Michael's website, GemsEnVogue.com, there hasn't been a new show listed since May. What's going on, people? Have TPTB decided to drop Michael?


And then there's poor Charles Winston with only a handful of pieces left. On his website, CharlesWinston.com, he still lists ShopNBC as an outlet for his jewelry, but there are no upcoming appearances listed.








Does ShopNBC want to consolidate all the CZ lines into the Brilliante Collection (which has many upcoming shows scheduled)? In lieu of their ongoing financial troubles, are they wanting a flagship brand like the Q's Diamonique and HSN's Absolute?

Quen Bea loves Signity ... I hope they aren't dropping it!

QVC Sales Slumping

Libery Media, which owns all of QVC and part of HSN (read about that here), reported a 4% increase in total second quarter revenue.

But all is not well in the house that Diamonique built.

The increase is due to a big 14% increase in international revenue--especially Japan. U.S. sales have been less than stellar.

According to an article from rapidtvnews.com, QVC's domestic revenue decreased in the second quarter. "The mix of product sold shifted to the accessories area from the home and jewelry categories. The average selling price increased six per cent from $44.83 to $47.39 while the total number of units shipped declined four per cent to 27.6 million from 28.8 million. Returns as a percent of gross product revenue increased due to product mix shifts and higher average selling prices. QVC.com sales as a percentage of domestic sales grew from 23% in the second quarter of 2007 to 25% in the second quarter of 2008."

So the products shifted, the prices went up, and sales went down. Looks like the only bright spot is the increase in Internet sales. No wonder the hosts have been harping about QVC.com lately.

We're hurting, Q! We can't afford to buy multiple sets Diamonique studs (Oh, snap! Shout out to Lisa Mason--you know how she loves a good stud!) to keep on hand in the gift drawer. I know that you are morally and ethically opposed to clearance sales, but I've heard that they actually work ... why not try having one for once?

Today's Blue Plate Specials ... Quack! Quack! Oink! Oink!

I would have been in fake diamond heaven last night between Discover Diamonique and the Victoria Wieck Anniversary if I wouldn't have been so sucked into those Olympic gymnastics. Sorry fake diamond peddlers. I'll be back. It was just a fling. I swear. It'll never happen again.

The QVC TSV(s) are (in no particular order) a Quacker Factory Retro Waffle Knit Studded Shirt & Jeannes Set and a Paula Deen's Smithfield 7lb Sampler: Pork, Wings, Ham Sausage & Ribs.

I just want to say up front that I find both Jeanne and Paula highly entertaining (not to mention smart and talented). And being a Southern lady myself (well, Southern at least), I can relate. However, having the two of them together for a dual TSV just seems to ... well ... I'm having trouble being snarky without being downright offensive. Ok, how about this ... people who watch the Q today could possibly think that the QVC customers might have something in common with this lady:

I'm just gonna move on now ...

Anyway, to celebrate the 21st Anniversary of the Today's Special Value (otherwise known as the TSV), the Q is offering free shipping on all the TSV's this week. Not to mention on the extra bonus TSV (isn't that called a Hot Pick? I'm confused.) I think that free booze would be more appropriate for the 21st anniversary. Get Sandra Lee on and have her whip up a special drink. It's always cocktail time with Sandra!

The HSN TS is the Youthful Essence Microdermabrasion Double-Up Kit by Susan Lucci. The Youthful Essence products seem to get good reviews, but to me it seems like the poor man's Clarisonic (not that I have a Clarisonic).

The ShopNBC OTV is the Sony U73T GPS Navigation System with Carry Case. Now, I'm no GPS expert, but I do know how to Google. It's cheaper at Circuit City, but you don't get any Value Pays.

Today's Blue Plate Specials ... Suck it Up!

HSN's TS sucks! Sorry, lame, I know. I just couldn't resist. Anyway, the TS is a Dyson DC07 Upright Cyclonic Vacuum Cleaner with Accessories. Dyson has a cult following and is supposed to be the greatest vacuum ever. The only complaint? It's too powerful. Oh dear, Queen Bea might accidentally vacuum up the cat.

QVC's TSV are Ryka Slip-on Quilted Mesh Skimmers. These look sooo comfy (and cute--especially that burgundy one). And they come in wide width. Praise be! Queen Bea's pork chop feet appreciate that! However, $39 seems a little on the expensive side for some slip-ons.

ShopNBC's OTV is a pair of 14K White or Yellow Gold 2.00ct Diamond Inside-Out Hoop Earrings. The diamond quality is about one step away from being a drill bit, but I like the earrings--they look stylish and well-made.

But, honestly chickadees, you should really just save the $999.96 and get yourself some fake diamonds. I have a pair of white gold Diamonique inside-out hoops that are fabulous and I've heard the Hollywood hoops are to die for.

Hot off the Press! Judith Ripka TSV

Judith Ripka Sterling Gemstone & Diamonique Auto-Delivery

QVC Price: $108.00 (not TSV price)

The price is per enhancer, not for all three.

Item# J38823

You get one enhancer now and one every 90 days.

1st: cross
2nd: heart
3rd: key (of course! it's the best one!)

I love Judith Ripka ... I just don't care for all the hearts, so I'll be taking a pass on this one.

Queen Bea is Off to the Ball!!!

Today's the big day of the Ball ... focus group ... whatever, same thing! If you don't already know, Queen Bea was invited to participate in a focus group discussion on jewelry and gemstone preferences of people who buy from home shopping channels.

They also asked us to wear jewelry that we like and explain why we like it. So I have on a Steel By Design ring, which I love because it looks like platinum, it's heavy, it's durable, and it was cheap. I also have on the much loved (what's not to love!) Barbara Bixby Romeo & Juliet garnet ring. Sigh ... I *heart* this ring.

Here's what I had to say about what I do NOT want:

They need to know that trying to pass off drill bits as diamonds is bad, and that stretching out gold so thin that it dents when you blow on it is very bad, and they need to know that designer needs to really be designer, not just a famous name slapped on the same ol' crap.

I'm leaving in a few hours, chickadees, so if there's anything you want me to mention, please drop me a quick line at homeshoppingqueen@gmail.com.

Now if I could just find where I put that damn Diamonique tiara ...

Tacori Crescent Line is a Dud

The new Tacori Crescent line is premiring on the Q on June 15th. After looking at the "real" Tacori Crescent Silhouette Line (example pictured to the left), I had some high expectations. And, other than the emerald ring, these just don't do it for me.


I'm a glutton for punishment when it comes to this line. I always get super excited and I'm always let down. I just keep coming back for more. Why? Why do I do this?

If you do see soemthing you like, be ready with guns and credit cards blazin' to order it quickly on the 15th because most Tacori does see out fast (except for the few pieces they order thousands and thousands of that we're forced to revisit all day long over and over and over again).


J35754Tacori Epiphany Diamonique Crescent Design Pendant w/Chain


J35772Tacori Epiphany Diamonique Crescent Design Drop Earrings


J35799Tacori Epiphany Diamonique Crescent Design Rose Pear Earrings




J35664Tacori Epiphany Diamonique Crescent Design Bloom Cut Ring

J35817Tacori Epiphany Diamonique Crescent Design Wide Band Ring

J35789Tacori Epiphany Diamonique Simulated Emerald Cresent Ring

Queen Bea MIA

I spent the weekend in the country visiting the in-laws. While hay bales were plentiful, Internet and cell phone service was not! Trying to play a little catch-up now ... especially since this whole blogging thing is so new to me.

Also ... it's Diamonique Week!!!! And Queen Bea looooooooves fake diamonds and isn't ashamed to announce it to the world (on an anonymous blog ... whatever). Can't wait! :-)

Possible Tacori TSV???

Could this ring be the new Tacori TSV for 6/15/08? Is it part of the new Crescent Collection? I wonder what that stone is? Whatever it is, Queen Bea loves it!!!

I have had bad luck with Tacori pieces though. The Diamonique stones seem too white or something and the metal is way to bright. I can't figure out what they are doing wrong. I love the designs though.

Item number is J35789, but it's not up on the website yet.

New High-Falutin Judith Ripka

Judith Ripka's new Basket Weave Collection for 2008 ... so how long do you think before we get the QVC version???

I love her QVC collection and, unlike alot of fans, I don't mind the Diamonique (Queen Bea has a dark, forbidden love for faux diamonds). I wish she'd do more of the lab created stones though. I do, however, have to beefs (what else is new ...): 1) Too many hearts! I can't stand hearts on jewelry because it seems so juvenile, and 2) Inconsistency of silver color. Sometimes you get a nice platinum patina (a la rhodium plating, I'm sure) and sometimes you get bright, shiny silver, and sometimes you get a really dull, grey dud. What is up with that, Judith? Figure out which factory is doing it right and stick with them!!!

Judith is going to have the TSV on 6/27/08 ... trying to find out what it will be.

For the Forbidden Love of Fake Diamonds: Diamonique Deal of the Day

"As Is" Diamonique 1.55 ct tw 4 Row Channel Set Band Ring 14K

Item# J14002

QVC Price: $172.50

As Is Price: $94.72

No Easy Pay

Limited sizes: 7, 8, 9

Only white gold

Oh my goodness ... Queen Bea is having heart palpitations!

I love Diamonique. I don't care what anybody says. And this looks like a winner. Small carat weight spread out over four channel-set rows of little brilliant-cut stones equals a very believable and wearable ring.

Queen Bea's finger is hoovering over the "add to cart" button ... that damn ring is just taunting me!

Less than $100 is not a bad price at all for a 14k gold ring. The Q charges that much for Epiphany! (Epiphany is silver coated in platinum for those not in the QVC loop.)

If you want it, act quick (as the host would proclaim: run, don't walk to the phone!). These as-is offers go fast. The good ones anyway.

Sigh. Queen Bea stares at the empty finger where this ring belongs and cries a little on the inside. I could always cancel if I change my mind ...

Queen Bea Got Invited to the Ball!

Well ... maybe not a ball exactly. I checked my email and found this invite:

As a valued jewelry and gemstone customer, we would like to invite you to participate in a research study on jewelry and gemstone preferences. The research will last approximately two hours. You will receive $75 cash compensation for participating in this study.

I have several slots available to be filled on a first come first serve basis on Wednesday June 18th, and Thursday June 19th. (Times listed below). The research being conducted in a group discussion format. You will spend time sharing your ideas and opinions about jewelry with research facilitators. It would be appreciated if you wore or brought a few pieces of jewelry that reflect your personal taste. This is not mandatory, only preferable.

These groups are enjoyable, as well as a great opportunity for you to talk about your jewelry interests. The $75 will be given to you at the conclusion of the research study.

If you are interested in joining us on the 18th or 19th of June, please answer the following questions and indicate which time slot you would prefer to attend. Again, the slots are filled on a first come, first served basis.

Questions:
Do you, or anyone in your family, work in advertising or public relations? Marketing research? Or for a manufacturer or retailer of jewelry?
Have you participated in a similar research panel within the last six months?
What shopping channels do you use to purchase jewelry from? ***

Wednesday June 18th : 9:00 am., 2:00 pm.
Thursday June 19th : 12 noon, 2:00 pm..

Thank you for your time. If you cannot make this particular group, but are interested in other market research studies, please let me know. Also, if you know anyone who hasn't purchased jewelry from television or online, we do have a specific group available for them to share their ideas and opinions.

***Gee, wonder why they would send me an invitation of all people. I never shop on home shopping channels or anything!

I am soooo excited! I get to make money telling these people exactly what I think. How fun! What jewelry should I wear? It needs to make a statement about what I will spend my hard-earned money on. Maybe the Barbara Bixby Romeo & Juliet ring ... it's beautiful, unique, designer, solid, quality craftsmanship, and not overpriced (although it's teetering on the verge of it!).

They need to know that trying to pass off drill bits as diamonds is bad and that stretching out gold so thin that it dents when you blow on it is very bad and they need to know that designer needs to really be designer, not just a famous name slapped on the same ol' crap.

Queen Bea is already polishing up her Diamonique tiara for the occasion!