You squeeze your ThighMaster in,
You let your ThighMaster out,
You squeeze your ThighMaster in and you shake it all about (ouch!)
You do the vendor shuffle and you turn yourself around
That's what it's all about!
Queen Bea has been poking around trying to find out where-oh-where all the usual vendors are these days. While some seem to have disappeared off the face of the earth, most of them just spun the infamous Home Shopping Wheel of Fortune and landed their wares safely at another network.
Let's do a quick rundown, shall we?
Somer Time … Since she's been around almost from the inception of home shopping, I have to start with Suzanne Somers. Now I mentioned here and here that things were looking a little fishy for Suzanne, and apparently even a blind squirrel gets a nut occasionally cause she soon disappeared from the HSN roster. But don't ever count Suzanne out. This is the woman who has parlayed a short stint as a ditsy blond on a sitcom thirty years ago into a multimillion-dollar empire. It didn't take long before she turned up, ThighMaster in tow, on ShopNBC.
The Real McCoy … This one is a bit of a sticky widget. Pam and Wes McCoy were apparently fired as ShopNBC hosts; however, Pam still has her "Pamela McCoy" (faux furs and leather blazer) fashion collection with them. From what I've read, she's going to remain there as a vendor through the end of the year. I just don't see how this can work! Pam needs her Wes by her side in order to function. How else can she utter her trademark, "Ohhhhhh, Wes!" while she admires the latest trinket?
Yeah, They're Fake … Dr. Rey, that icky Dr. 90210 plastic surgeon that touches all the models inappropriately, moved his shapewear collection from HSN to ShopNBC. And he's now peddling a Sensual Solutions skincare line too. Sensual? Honestly, is that really necessary? Is fake boob grabbing not enough for him? Although I can't prove it, I'm fairly certain that Rhonda Shear led the models in a revolt to oust him from HSN.
Judy and Paul Sittin' in a Tree … Judy Crowell--former QVC host, former HSN host and former wife of that poofy-haired Jeff Hewson--is now a fashion vendor at ShopNBC. Her husband, Paul Deasy--former QVC host and former HSN host--is now a gem vendor at ShopNBC. These two lovebirds have managed to work in some capacity at all three major home shopping channels. Can you imagine all the interesting tidbits that they must know? Oh, how Queen Bea would love to be a fly on the wall.
Perish the Thought … Kim Parrish, the former QVC host who then became a fashion vendor at HSN, now has her collection at ShopNBC. I just want to point out that Queen Bea saw this coming a long time ago and nobody believed me! Yes, I'm tooting my own tooty horn here. Toot-toot!
They Got the Sense Knocked Out of 'em … Sensa, the controversial diet sprinkles that are supposed to make you eat less, were originally supposed to be on the Q, but that never happened. Instead they ended up on HSN where they got the sprinkles beat out of them by Andrew Lessman, who refused to be associated with a network that would weightloss sprinkles. Lucky for them, they were able to land safely at ShopNBC.
More Vendor Shuffle Hokey Pokey to come in Part 2!