Liza Bedazzles and Befuddles on HSN

Not that I don't love Liza with a Z, but after watching last night's rather disjointed performance on HSN, I do believe Liza might be sharing a locker with Paula Abdul in the greenroom.

I'll give her this though, at least Liza refused to tow the home shopping party line by insisting that we all stack 27 bangle bracelets on each arm. Seriously Bobbi, sometimes one really is more than enough!

Colleen and Muffy

Just because I love dogs, I thought I'd post these cute pictures of Colleen Lopez and her little doggie, Muffy.

Doncha love how Muffy is rockin' the bling-bling.

Colleen did mention in her blog that Paula Abdual is working on some jewelry for our little four-legged friends. Can't wait to watch those presentations! Paula tends to trip over her Chihuahuas and fall into walls. Poor Paula.

Queen Bea Reaches for the Stars

This is the Paula Abdul "Reach for the Stars" ring that Paula took off her own finger and gave to that cackling contestant who we all love to hate, Tatiana, during last night's episode of American Idol. Tatiana already had the coordinating bracelet and Paula wanted her to have the set. Plus, Paula wanted to oh-so-subtly promote her HSN jewelry line to a captive audiance of millions.

If you haven't been following Idol this season, here's a little sample of Tatiana's cheese-grater ways (and don't say I didn't give you fair warning!):



The ring is on sale for only $12.95 and is a customer pick (!). Tatiana has been chosen as the Vote for the Worst favorite so she might be around for a while for that kind of voting block behind her.

I have to confess, the same part of my heart that loves the cheese of home shopping, also adores the cheese of American Idol. I just can't help myself!


I'm fairly certain that I'll be fishing around for ways to tie American Idol into this blog so that I can write about it with reckless abandon. So far, Paula, Clay Aiken, and Barry Manilow are the only clear links I can think of, but I'm willing to get creative.

How bad is this little addiction of mine? I'll admit to going to one of the American Idol concerts. In my defense, it was just one and I only went to see my all-time Idol fav and number one boyfriend, Chris Daughtry. He totally rocked it too. Mr. Queen Bea doesn't mind me drooling over Chris since they could pretty much pass for twins. It's a healthy kinda lust, y'all!

So if you aren't into Idol, you'll just have to gloss over these little posts from time to time. I just need an outlet for my obsession.

The Tale of Two Gold Mesh Necklaces

Watch the video below of Suzanne Somers presenting a suite of gold mesh jewelry. Even though the model was wearing a sample of the necklace, it was not for sale--only the bracelet and the earrings. Unbeknownst to Suzanne, there was a bit of a problem with the necklace.



The host, Colleeen Lopez, explained that the necklace shipment was delayed for some reason, which happens often ... or at least every now and then!

None of this would be suspicious or strange if it weren't for the fact that a few days later, a heavily-promoted Miss Paula Abdul shows up selling her own gold mesh necklace. Here's the presentation of Paula's version of the necklace:



Did HSN pull Suzanne's necklace at the last minute to placate Paula and her people? No matter what you think of Suzanne or her stuff (and I'm not a fan of either of these scarf-necklace things), she has been with HSN for years and has consistently made them money. Why would HSN dis a proven money maker for a crapshoot on Paula?

The Gift That She Is

So Paula was on HSN quite a bit this weekend. I for one was completely disappointed. She was relatively coherent (for Paula--it's all relative people!) and no major incidents occurred that I saw. I'm so disappointed.

Yes, she had her usual slow, deliberate, slurred Anna-Nicole-style speech pattern, but I'm pretty sure that I detected actual nouns and verbs in her sentences. Although I did notice that her hands seemed to shake uncontrollably when she was holding the jewelry for a closeup, which isn't funny in the slightest. It's actually very, very sad.

The hosts also took great pains to not only keep Paula focused on the task at hand, but to treat her "like the gift that she is." The ridiculous amount of personal compliments, the fawning over her products, and the sucking-up all seemed like blatant ego stroking and made the hosts look like a bunch of silly sycophants.

I loved how they were selling her picture with a "signature" on it. Not an autograph, just a printed on signature. Awesome! I'm sure it will make a great present for that someone special. The coup de grace, however, was when they offered the big surprise Estaban "Tribute to Paula Abdul" guitar. It's like HSN is trying to make fun of itself.

At least I have American Idol to look forward to!!!

She's Ba-aaack

After a short but "interesting" run selling jewelry on QVC, Paula Abdul is back--this time on HSN, just like I predicted in this post. No, I'm no psychic like John Edward. I just know that these vendors almost always pop up again on a competing home shopping channel. It's like one big game of home shopping vendor Whack-A-Mole.

Her new "Forever Your Girl" collection will include "colorfully chic and unique" jewelry, handbags, and keepsake accessories--not that it matters what she's selling. With Paula, it's all about the entertainment. I mean, has she ever really provided much in the way a discernible critique on American Idol in all that slurred Paula-rambly-speak? Noooooo ... but she sure can be interesting to watch, can't she?

Who else can judge a performance before it's ever given??? Only Paula. So there's no telling what she'll say or do on HSN. Pass out? Strip? Dance on the table? Speak in tongues? Who knows! You'll have to check out Paula on December 13th and 14th to find out.

Today's Blue Plate Specials ... 10,000 Calories

Be sure to vote in the Home Shopping Cage Match!!! It's at the top of the right hand column, so it's easy to find. Every vote counts, Vote or Die, Rock the Vote, and all that business. This week two plastic surgery divas face off: Joan Rivers vs. Adrienne Arpel. Who do you think does it better???

I was watching the Olympics swimmers in their little Spanx-looking swimsuits again last night and saw an interesting segment about Michael Phelps. He said that he has to eat between 8 to 10 thousand calories a day. 10,000 calories!!! Basically, when he's not swimming or sleeping, he's eating. I would look like Jabba the Hut!

There are rumors flying that Paula Abdul is coming to HSN after her split from the Q and that Rosie O'Donnell will also be selling craft stuff on HSN. I haven't seen anything to substantiate either of these yet, but my fingers are crossed! Many people seem to think that it would be a bad thing. Come on! Think about the entertainment value, people.

HSN TS is a Slinky Brand 3 piece Jacket and Pant Set. I am not feeling this one--probably because it's hand wash and lay flat to dry. Although, I will say that I'm glad they offer the different blazer styles (three-quarter sleeve, button, or zip) and different lengths (petite, regular, and tall). I'm sorry, but you just can't hem something like this! Or at least I can't.


The QVC TSV is the Borba Age Defying Complete 4-piece Recovery Kit. Although I haven't tried this kit, I do have a little Borba in my collection. I don't know how well it works since I can never use one product exclusively or long enough to actually find out. I can say that it smells great! And if you want that new age defying advanced recovery creme, you'll have to get it from QVC since it won't be in other stores until February.


The Judith Ripka TSV on Thursday will be a Sterling 18", 22" or 54" Cultured Freshwater Pearl Chain You can go ahead and order it now ... not that I love Ripka or anything. Unlike Czar Naomi, Judith seems to actually appreciate her QVC customers. And don't forget: Free Shipping on all TSV's this week!


The ShopNBC OTV is a 14K White or Yellow Gold Five Stone 1.00ct Princess Cut Diamond Ring. The description states that the color is H-I and the clarity is I2-I3, but it seems to look better than that. Maybe the on-air samples are a little better. I do like this ring since I have a thing for band-style rings.

Where Oh Where Did My Paula Go?

Where oh where could Paula be?!?!? QVC just hasn't been the same without her crazy ways. I don't even have American Idol any more to get me through my Paula withdrawal (Queen Bea is utterly obsessed with American Idol, dawg! I don't care if she critiques performances before they even happen! Whatev!)

There's a rumor going around that she called into HSN the other night, but I didn't see it, so I can't say one way or the other. I hope that means she's got something in the works with them ... reach for the stars, Paula!

All that's left of Paula's jewelry on the QVC website is one little ole As-Is Reach for the Stars bangle ...

And just in case you haven't already seen it, here's the clip of Paula having a meltdown backstage at QVC ...

Cost of Paula Abdul As-Is Bangle: $18.99
Cost to download her new song, Dance Like There's No Tomorrow: 99 cents
Paula having a QVC meltdown ... priceless