The Ugly Side of Home Shopping

Can I just say for the record that former home shopping employees and vendors who are no longer under any contract, non-compete, or any other can't-talk-to-anyone-about-anything-or-we'll-sue-you-into-oblivion legal restrictions are very near and dear to Queen Bea's dark royal heart.

Former QVC host, Steve Bryant, has decided that he needs some blog therapy, y'all! And we are here to help.

Apparently, while he was still working at the Q, he overheard two sophomoric, snickering nincompoops ... sorry, I mean two program hosts, calling him a liar for a cute on-air story he told about a radio job he had back in college and then they "went into a diatribe about how ugly (he) was."

Steve might not be Miss America, but no one can successfully sell on television for 15 years and look like Nosferatu. Ain't gonna happen. Perhaps he didn't faux tan enough for their liking.

But the story gets better ...

"They didn’t know I was standing right around the corner. I came out and let them know I had heard what they said and that it was good to know how they felt. They were speechless, not even a yum-yum face!"

No yum-yum face?!? You mean like this one?

"Panic ensued! The other hosts in the lounge who were listening to my “put down” had obviously gone to our immediate superior to “rat out” their peers, hoping to beat me to the punch and lessen their “second hand guilt.” Actually, I had no intention of any official reprisal. I was going to confront each host privately and settle things person-to-person.

"Apparently, both of the offending hosts had been contacted by our immediate superior since they called my voicemail and apologized. Neither ever said anything to me in person, I guess believing their voicemail mia culpa would suffice.

"Many years later, I guess I should let it go. Writing this has helped to put this behind me. Still, I would like to settle the score in person and will probably do so soon. I’m no Robert Redford, but I do take exception to the “ugly” thing as well as the lying thing.

"They should at least have the guts to apologize in person. Maybe we’ll have crab cakes and laugh about the whole thing…oh, wait, that won’t work. Those Chinese crustaceans are almost extinct. Maybe some cheesecake…or anything squishy I could throw. Just sayin’…

"I wonder if they read my site? Guess I’ll find out."

Can you believe all this petty, back-stabbing, ass-covering nastiness? Unbelievable!

Check out Steve's Blog--this is just the tip of the crap cake, y'all!

David Venable ... More Than a Yum-Yum Face

QVC host David Venable--originator of the infamous "yum-yum" face and the new host of In the Kitchen since Bob Bowersox disappeared--sure has some dedicated online fans! Whoever they are put together this inspired collage of David showing some skin.

What do you think is his secret? Total Gym? Aero Pilates? Crab Cakes? Hmmm ...

Shopping Around ... More of the Same

Scott Barnes cosmetics has been discontinued after a relationship with investors soured. Right now his products are still on the QVC website. I wonder if they will go on clearance soon.

Check out this site for some cheap Iman purses. Instead of selling for over a hundred dollars like on HSN, you can get them for only thirty bucks. Now that is a globally chic price.

This blogger believes all those stars at the Golden Globes managed to stuff themselves into those form-fitting gowns without having a muffin top by using various Dr. "hands all over the models' boobs" Rey shapewear. I found him mildly entertaining on Dr. 90210, but he just skeeves me out on HSN. Those poor models. And while I love the award shows, they aren't the same without Joan on the red carpet.

How YesPilates got started on HSN and the patent battle that ensued.

The "Not Available on QVC" contest (not horrible, but probably NSFW).

Some advice on how to get your product on QVC, but I'm pretty sure that they just want to keep showing the same old stuff over and over and over again.

Website customer satisfaction ratings for the holiday season look good for the Q, which came in third behind Amazon and Netflix and ahead of Walmart. HSN, on the other hand, had the largest decline in satisfaction by dropping nine points and landing below industry satisfaction standards. If other customers had the bad customer service this blogger did, I’m not surprised.

Mindy Grossman, CEO of HSN, was honored for her outstanding contributions to the fashion industry by the Fashion Scholarship Fund. HSN vendors, Iman and Patricia Fields, were presenters.

HSN has fired nine more people. This time in Virginia.

Not only are QVC customers in debt, so is QVC. Suze Orman would not approve. Where is their emergency fund?

MTV’s reality show “Run’s House” will feature some behind-the-scenes footage of Justine Simmons presenting her Brown Sugar jewelry line on HSN this season.

Tosca Reno, creator of the Eat-Clean Diet, is very excited that she was asked to be on the Q as a clean eating and cooking expert. What’s clean eating you ask? No sugar, white flour, alcohol, or processed foods. While I appreciate her passion for health, I couldn’t live like that and be happy. I’m curious to see how this type of eating will go over with the QVC audience or if it will be modified in some way. In any case, she changed her life around with her diet so kudos to Tosca!

Recently ousted ShopNBC host Kerry McNally quickly got a new gig as a traffic reporter. He must have seen this coming.

The It Cosmetics girls had a great time kicking off the new year on HSN.

Ever wonder what Christmas dinner would be like if it were catered by QVC? This lady did it and loved it. As much food as she bought, Yum-Yum Face David should have been her free gift!

Today's Blue Plate Specials ... Eat in the Heat!

QVC is obsessed with all this summer eating business! Maybe David “Yum-Yum Face” Venable and his appetite have taken over the Q. Anyway, today--for your July 4th picnic prep pleasure--the TSV is the Kitchen King Pro 11-piece Food Preparation Station.

This is one of those gadgets that does a little of everything. It looks like it works (really like the suction cup feet!), but I always end up with storage and clean up issues with these things. Regardless, it’s hotter than a goat’s butt in a pepper patch around here so Queen Bea will not be eating outside any time soon!




HSN has the Clean-A-Bout 1600psi Premium Electric Pressure Washer as their TS. I’m sure it’s great, but I just can’t sit through those horrid presentations where the washer is roaring and the host is trying to talk over the sound without sounding too much like they’re screaming. Not enjoyable. However, Laura Hutton will be on today and that is enjoyable. Hope she got some sleep!




ShopNBC has a fabulous 14k 1.26ct. diamond flex ring from Sonia Bitton of the Galerie de Bijoux Collection—I just love saying all that in my horrendous French accent (I sound strikingly like the chef from The Little Mermaid, “Les poissons, les poissons, how I love les poissons!”).

But, as fabulous as it might be, it’s also over $1600. Not really doable. This is why Queen Bea has an undying love for fake diamonds (note recent Tacori ring purchase). I wonder if these flex rings are easier or harder for people to slide over their knuckles.

Blue Plate Special Daily Round Up ... the Yum-Yum Face Strikes Back!

QVC's Corky's BBQ Pork Ribs Sampler TSV is finger lickin' good (hey, don't judge ... it's hard to get all the BBQ sauce out from under acyclic nails ... maybe they'll come out with a a special Fuller brush for that!). Oh my, a food TSV means that we have so many David "Yum-Yum Face" Venable moments to look forward to today! Where I live, I can buy Corky's ribs at the grocery store and at the Corky's restaurant down the street, so i just don't get why I would want to have to pay to ship them. Are there places in the country that don't have Corky's?

The ShopNBC OTV is the Comodynes Total Body 20 Pack Tanning Towelettes. Now being fish-belly while myself, and not being a big fan of cancer or wrinkles, I'm all for anything that will give me a little color in a safe way. But they need to learn a little restraint! A little goes a long way, chickadees. I just don't want to encourage any home shopping channel on this particular topic. Please refer to the Oompa-Loompa Hosts post for a full explanation. :-)

HSN is in updated hippie mode with Tatami sandal. On the plus side, the sandal has the famous Birkenstock footbed and they are kind enough to offer them in wide width too (Queen Bea greatly appreciates this!!!), but I'm just not feeling it. Sorry. It's just trying too hard ... or maybe I'm just a tree-hugging, whale-saving, crunchy-granola traditionalist that just wants to wear plain ol' Birkinstocks when I go to a folk concert in the park. Maybe not, cause I do kinda like these other ones ...