Saturday, May 23, 2009

Fava Beans and a Nice Chianti

"A census taker once tried to test me. I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice chianti." --Hannibal Lecter

no!no!--famous for their hair removal device that is painful or not painful to use and works well or doesn't work at all depending on who you talk to--just came out with something to help tone your saggy, wrinkly face. Like a Total Gym for yout face, the FaceTrainer is supposed to provide resistance training that gets your face muscles in shape.

Clinical studies have shown that 10 minutes a day through 30 days of use will result in 71% reduction in sagging and 42% reduction in wrinkles. The FaceTrainer™ enhances the muscle activity by up to 93%. ... Facial exercising has been proven clinically for many years to help tone the underlying muscles of the face and neck, increase blood flow and reduce wrinkling and sagging.

While I appreciate anything that helps me stay looking younger without surgery or injections, this contraption scare me and reminds me of something else entirely ...

It's already on HSN and is selling for $200(!) and, personally, I think that if I want to try the whole face muscle workout thing, I'd much rather try the Facial Flex from the Q. It's only $30 and it's far less scary looking. Ridiculous looking, yes ... but not nearly so terrifying.

If I help you, Clarice, it will be "turns" with us too. Quid pro quo. I tell you things, you tell me things. Not about this case, though. About yourself. Quid pro quo. Yes or no? --Hannibal Lecter

I can't wait to see them demonstrate the Hannibal Lecter mask live!!!


  1. Will Graham- "No, I know I'm not smarter than you"

    Hannibal Lecter- "Then how did you catch me?"

    Graham- "You had certain....disadvantages."

    Lecter- "What disadvantages?"

    Graham- "You're insane"

    From MANHUNTER (1986) and RED DRAGON (2002).

    I did a blog entry in February comparing the two movies, with clips and a comparison...Hopkins was the better Lecter, William Petersen the better Graham.

    Copy and paste to take a peek.

    Anyway...back to the subject at hand....the Face Trainer? OMG! Can you image somebody walking in on you wearing that thing? You look you've been in a trainwreck, for God's sake! They'd freak!

    Geeesh...another anniversary present guaranteed to get a guy a week or two of sleeping on the couch!

    Oh...WELCOME BACK, QB! You've been missed!

  2. I'm glad somebody understood the fava beans comment. It was the first thing that popped into my head when I saw that face contraption! And no one could possibly be better than Hopkins. :-)

  3. If you leave the humor aside and think of it seriously for a moment, you will see beyond the look of the mask. I mean, how can a person be negative with the chance to have a younger look of teir face? with 10 minutes a day of a face work out you can have wonderfull results and postpone the palstic surgery in a few years. So actually- why not?
    you see- One day you wake up, look in the mirror and find out you're not 16 years old anymore. Your muscles aren't the same and surprisingly you find a wrinkle you could swear wasn't there yesterday. You don't like the shape of your body and you realize that something has to be done. So you start with exercise and then combine it with a diet. And if you are consistent and committed enough, you see results. If not, well…

    Same thing with your face - you can't just put your face on a diet, but you can certainly give it the exercises it needs, just like ANY OTHER MUSCLE in your body.

    This is how I got to know the Face Trainer, which is not only clever workout accessory; it also helps with blood circulation. I already think my face feels and looks younger, tighter, and glowing.

    When you go to the gym you work on all parts of your body, symmetrically. FaceTrainer (I think of it as my private gym for my face) does the same thing, but for my face. The FaceTrainer is made of neoprene that provides flattens the skin (and protects me for more wrinkle creation as in when you pout), adds resistance to the training (like training bands, dumbbells, things like that). But, as with anything else at home, in order to achieve best results, you have to work at it. It's not an overnight miracle. This is the best way to gain results. With any exercise or workout, you don't get real, lasting results without a bit of time and a lot of commitment. (how many of us have bought a treadmill and never used it ….????)

    What is the difference between a body work out and a face work out? I see only the benefits form this workout. I mean, I like the idea that my face has chance to tighten up a bit too!

    Of course the solution can either be provided with the knife (ouch … and PAINFULL, and TIME Consuming) or an injection (again, Ouch … and costly) one. I guarantee you, those cost way more than 200$. Compared to those costs, the FaceTrainer made more sense to me. I definitely preferred 10 minutes of face exercise a day to the knife or the needle.

    My name is Monica and I am 40 years old. I've used the FaceTrainer for a little over 2 months now. I spend no more than 10 minutes exercising a day. 14 days after I first started using it, my face felt more energized than it had in a long time. And yes, my kids laughed (still do) and I get hockey mask and Hannibal Lector jokes from my husband all the time. But you know what, both my family and friends started giving me compliments about how much better I am looking these days. So when they laugh, I do too.
    I just wanted to give you another perspective from somebody who has actually tried it.

    1. I agree with doing facial exercises, but I do them without that hot, hideous mask and get great results. Google "facial yoga" and pick the ones that suit you. Free, and not claustrophobic or hot.

  4. Monica, thanks for your testimonial. I've heard various comments over the years about this device and I wondered what was true.

    Still, I can't get past all the matte makeup on the woman who demonstrates this product on QVC. I can't stop staring at her no-glow bisque eye shadow.

    But that's just me.

  5. Monica, everything you say makes sense & it's great to hear that it's working for you. However, i still maintain that the treadmill makes a great clothes hanger.

  6. Quoting from Thomas Harris' book:

    "A census taker tried to quantify me once. I ate his liver with some fava beans and a big Amarone. Go back to school, little Starling."

    Wish the film had stuck to the book. A culture vulture like Lecter wouldn't be seen dead guzzling a common country wine plonk like Chianti. Amarone della Valpolicella is so much more like him.

  7. I have the QVC product. It does nothing for my 60+ face, but it has helped my neck.

    If you want to spend money on facial contraptions, either the Suzanne Sommers device or the NuFace on QVC would be better options. Prepare to break the piggy bank to buy one of those, however.

  8. i prefer to have some wrinkles instead use this ridiculous "Hannibal Lecter's mask" device, what a technological fail man!


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